This is not going to be a repeating feature, I simply think I will build it up as though it may be one. The reason - The utterly shocking film me and Ben saw the other day.
This film was one of the poorest quality films I have seen recently.
It is based loosely around the book “the lion, the witch and the wardrobe”.
But it really has so many excerpts from other films that at nearly all times, the plot makes no sense at all.
Main Characters
- Peter - Nerdy Loser who is a crap chicken superhero, (X-Men reference here).
- Susan - Some black chick who doesn’t really have anything interesting happening to her in the whole film, cept her origin which is being on a plane with snakes(Snakes on a Plane reference).
- Edward - The snitch, played by dude from those munchies films.(Nacho Libre reference)
- Lucy - The young naive one, played by that bird with the unshaven muff from Scary Movie (scary movie reference)
The Plot
They are all roped together in a hair-brained chocolate factory scheme.(Charlie and the Chocolate Factory reference) While hiding from Charlie’s bum-fun fetish, they all hide in a cupboard. They all get sent in, at Mr Tumness’s house where there is a cribs take off. Then they all go to train for the fight against the white bitch (stiflers mom) at a Hogwarts type place. Edward gets busted out of jail by jack swallows(pirates of the Caribbean), then they all go to fight, Peter gets laid they win the fight against the white bitch and become kings and queens and theres some other random stuff in it too.
This film is such a mixture of other films that it really makes little sense at all.
Parodies and Shit
I realize that I have missed out some other films, but I reckon I covered the main ones, but so as not to piss off anyone, these are the parodies that wiki lists.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
The Da Vinci Code
X-Men: The Last Stand
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest
Click
Harry Potter film series
Nacho Libre
Legally Blonde
Snakes on a Plane
Superman Returns
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
Scarface
The Star Wars film series
Mission: Impossible 3
Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle
Casino Royale
MTV Cribs
Punk’d
American Pie
Grease 2
Date Movie
American Idol
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift
Finding Nemo
Analysis
After the movie was released, the reviews that were available were generally negative. The movie was panned from all angles and was thought to have “repetitive bad jokes. Yahoo users gave the movie a C rating with a D+ critic grade as of February 4, 2007. IGN movies gave Epic Movie 1.5 stars. Epic Movie currently has a 2% rating on rotten tomatoes. Imdb users gave the movie 2.2 stars, making it the 38th in the bottom 100 movies.
And I have to agree, if I see a worse film this year I will be very upset.
This post was written by 
Woolie
February 15th, 2007 at 5:46 pm
Better not go watch that then. Sounds shite.